I'm gonna say something that stands against what I've been saying and believing for years.

I don't think your sense of identity is the key to holding it all together.

For the past 7 years, I've been almost exclusively working with founders and execs who used to be athletes.

The problem we believed they had?

They lost their identity.

They were athletes in HS and college but didn't go pro. Then all the energy went into building a business.

They built a family along the way, which left no time for themselves.

They stopped being athletes.

Then, in their mid 40s, they got fat and so fed up with the way they felt… I believed the solution was bringing that identity back.

Reinvented, repackaged, in sync with their lifestyle and schedule.

I think I was wrong…

The conversation that triggered it

I recently texted an old client asking how he was doing.

He said he had a bit of a slowdown, but the thought that got him back on track was…

"I'm a bodybuilder."

It put things back in order for him. It gave him back the map.

And it's awesome. He came to me to "get jacked" because he was tired of going back and forth with all those random programs he'd tried before.

Problem is… I texted him a week later, and the workload screwed up the label for him.

Now, he's a beast and I knew he was gonna be fine. (He already is.)

But it got me thinking.

That need for a label, that attachment to an identity… It can really fuck things up for you.

Because you don't pay attention to internal signals anymore. You don't read your body anymore. You don't adjust. And you aren't ready for change.

And change always comes uninvited.

It'll take away your structure, your meals, your supplements, your gym…

And you ain't a bodybuilder anymore. You're struggling again.

You've lost the label that defined you, and you wait for things to change so you can wear it again.

But until then, you're a mess.

The way I see it:

If you need a defined sense of identity, that's fine. As long as it doesn't collapse when the circumstances change.

The identity you want to build is the identity of you.

A guy who can find a way out in any situation. Who has enough knowledge, enough skills, and is crafty enough to land in any circumstances, get it done and keep a great outlook.

P.S. If you've got a label and it's holding, you don't need me. If it broke last quarter and you're waiting for the next clean Monday to wear it again, that's a problem. The Restart Audit is 45 minutes where we find what actually keeps you stuck, and you leave with an insight that will change things even if we don't work together.

​Book the Restart Audit >>​